


Lust, Need, Love

by holyhael



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alpha Castiel, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angel Dean Winchester, Demon Castiel, M/M, Masturbation, Omega Dean, Porn, Prayer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-06
Updated: 2014-05-06
Packaged: 2018-01-21 02:36:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1534472
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holyhael/pseuds/holyhael
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In his rut, Castiel prays.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lust, Need, Love

**Author's Note:**

> mentioned meg/cas
> 
> thank you [nick](http://nephilicious.tumblr.com/) for beta-ing. you helped give me confidence with this thing, and i really can't thank you enough. i edited a little more after nick looked at it though, so all mistakes are mine!!

Castiel hasn’t done this since he was human.

He distinctly remembers that time, kneeling at Hannah’s bedside, watching her every labored breath from her gangrene lips.  _God_ , Castiel started just like the many times before,  _Please answer my prayer. My sister is sick. The entire country is sick. Please have mercy. What has humanity done to deserve this? I believe in you. Please._

Only Hannah’s strained breathing answered him. Castiel prayed no more.

But that changes today.

Raising his head, he looks up at the ceiling of his apartment. Sunlight filters weakly through the skylight and streams down Castiel’s front, turning him even warmer than the beginning of his rut typically does.

Before Castiel met Dean Winchester, Castiel would spend his ruts with an omega human named Meg. But the angel…. It feels like Castiel is cheating on someone when he’s having sex with Meg: cheating on Meg by having thoughts of the freckled angel in his head while he’s fucking her, cheating on Dean for getting intimate with Meg, cheating on himself for not being with the person he really wants.

Will Dean even help him? It may not be fair to ask.

Castiel’s gut rebels with the thought, though it’s a true one. All Castiel has asked of Dean - to rebel against Heaven, to torture for him when Castiel didn’t want his demonic nature to take over him - and he’s going to ask for more?

 He shouldn’t, he _knows_ that. But he does.

"Dean Winchester," Castiel begins aloud. He swallows thickly and licks his lips before finding the words to continue. "I’m praying. That must tell you the matter is urgent." Castiel stops himself again and inhales heavily. "I do need help."

No telltale flutter of wings succeeds Castiel’s prayer. Dean probably learned that helping Castiel only gives him trouble.

"Please," Castiel entreats again.

Still, there is nothing.

The low buzz of energy beneath his skin and in his belly climbs steadily in the silence until it’s too much to bear. Heat burns his skin so hot he backs out of the sunbeam and shrugs off his trenchcoat and his suit jacket. Both articles of clothing fall to the dirty floor. Castiel’s belt is soon to follow.

Eyes closed and breath coming quick, Castiel says, “Dean Winchester, please hear my prayer.” As he continues on, he makes short work of his shoes and pants, toeing off the ankle boots and pushing off the trousers. “I need you.”

The words come out choked and honest, and saying them gives Castiel a sense of relief that dampens his intense arousal for a moment. Need. Castiel needs Dean. And it’s not just because his rut feels like it’s killing him from the inside. He needs to keep Dean safe. He needs to make him happy when the angel wants to be, he needs to make him feel loved because he is.

"I need you," Castiel pants, falling against the bed. He grabs his cock in his hand and squeezes. The sensation can’t be half as good as it would feel to be inside Dean’s tight hole, but a flash of arousal still sparks in his belly. His breath comes in shaky stops and starts. Hot blood races in his ears.

Oh, what must it be like to be mated to Dean? An angel and a demon coupling isn’t unheard of, but it is rare, since angels and demons often find each other detestable. As they rightfully should. Castiel holds contempt for most angels, finds their revulsion of humanity and life on Earth despicable. How can angels - beings supposedly pure and good-intentioned - abhor their Father’s creation, one made in His own image?

Dean is different. He sees the flaws in his sibling’s Paradise, appreciates the glory that is humanity. He rebelled against the Host because it was the right thing to do, orders be damned. He sacrificed nearly everything he had to make sure humans kept their lives and free will. He loves with such intensity that it must burn to be in his heart.

Castiel thrusts into his fist, desperate. He misses the warmth and wetness of another person; his own fist in comparison is a poor substitute. Maybe he should’ve called Meg. She must be wondering why he hasn’t contacted her yet, especially since they plan his ruts and her heats together. Maybe he should call Dean again.

He rolls until he’s on his hands and knees, fucking down into his fist like it’s Dean’s hole. A groan rumbles from his throat amidst his pants. And then, words.

“Dean Winchester,” he exhales. His chest shudders as his wrist twists at the top of its motion. Pleasure shoots up his spine and makes him gasp. “Dean!” The angel may not be with Castiel, but he imagines as if he were. Dean beneath him, writhing and hot, eyes nearly glowing with that bright, bright grace as he looks up at Castiel. Because they’d be chest-to-chest, breaths shared, wholesome. Dean’s hips would cant up to reach every one of Castiel’s thrusts, and his legs would wrap around Castiel like a constrictor, tightening the closer he and Castiel reach that blissful peak and fall off the edge together -

“Hear my prayer,” Castiel gasps, feeling precome smooth in his fist. It doesn’t feel like omega slick, but it’s close enough that Castiel groans and tightens his grip. “The things I would do to you,” he murmurs.

Knot them together, bite his neck to say  _mine_. Wings, halos, tails. Toys, ties, plugs. Pretty bows and satin fabric. Whips, dirty voices, blindfolds. Trust.  _Love_.

Castiel doesn’t get to say all that out loud before his orgasm overpowers him, seemingly out of nowhere. He rides the waves of it in shock.

Love.

Who knew demons could love?

See, it isn’t need. Need is basic, and although the feeling can be close to love, they aren’t always synonymous. Love is deeper than that, lasts much longer than the instant gratification of need; it’s sincere, profound, unconditional, impossible. It’s everything, it’s -

“Dean.”

Castiel collapses back onto the bed, staring up at the glow in the dark stars tacked to the ceiling above. His mind goes curiously blank except for the background thrumming of oh.

The sun is sinking into the mountains when Castiel wakes up after his nap. He rubs at his crusted eyes. He must have been asleep for hours, given the sunset. Had it been any other week he wouldn’t think anything of it, but he’s in the beginning of his rut; he should have felt the urge to mate again within an hour of his knot going down.

He feels that urge now, but it’s suppressed to the point that it feels like he’s merely in the presence of a potential mate, not in his rut. Odd.

With a grimace, he sits up and reaches behind himself to feel at the crusty come on his back and on his bedsheets. Perhaps it wouldn’t be wise to wash them now if he’s only going to dirty them again in the same fashion shortly, but it feels disgusting, so, while he’s not out of his mind in his rut, Castiel strips the bed and runs the sheets through the washer.

He’s shaking his pillows out of their cases when it flutters to the bare mattress. A single, ebony feather. Castiel picks it up by the quill and holds it to his face.

Is it?

It can’t be.

Experimentally, heart pounding, Castiel gives the feather a sniff. It smells overwhelmingly of purity, righteousness, and omega, but most of all of  _Dean_.

A feather from his would-be mate’s wing.

Interesting.

 


End file.
